Saturday, March 28, 2009

Inhaling the Rain of Spring Break...Ahhh

Being in NYC with my 25 y.o. crew gives me a lot of insight and hope of possibilities for the future. I see them living their lives and managing the stresses of the non-profit world (what I plan to do) and teaching (what I currently do). They manage active social lives and are seemingly happy and healthy. Yes, the grass always looks greener and I guess I'll see---I will make a classroom visit/observation to a friend's 4th grade class in the Bronx. It is good to see my friends, parents and grandma, but I can't help but think of the quickly nearing testing and the rest of the school well as my own future. I desperately NEED to change schools, but am scared of the reality or possibility that reviews from my principal will hold me back, as unfair as it is to me--with neither her nor me wanting me to stay. While up North the ideas of graduate/doctoral studies have been pushed upon me--"now is the time to go to school!" Wake Forest is offering free tuition plus a stipend to "minorities" (I hate this term btw)...etc, etc. The thought of more school makes me frustrated--I go to school now and am sadly barely maintaining--because as I see in my job searches-experience is valued way more than schooling.

And as I go in the classroom everyday I see why. My boughie Amherst lambskin diploma doesn't mean anything there. It means I maneuvered the system enough to get in and out, but in the process gained little life skills, acredidation or experience to get the kind of job I ultimately want. As feel good as a liberal arts college was at the time and while the name means something in the Northeast--I would have been better served (and in substantially less debt) had I gone to the University of Massachusetts Amherst for free and gotten a degree in a major with actual job training. I value my knowledge and education, but it has served thus far to be fruitless aside from my innate knowledge that I am a better writer, more well read and more intelligent than my principal.

Yes, I understand that a BA is less valued than MA or PhDs--however, while I can't be held to it, I will not be making the choice to pursue any more schooling after I finish my master's next summer. However, I will stay encouraging my B to go ahead and get his BA on, because as hard as the economy is and he will confirm--that is one degree that is important to have under your belt. He is lucky to have started with experience to guide his college-bound options. I was raised highly valuing education and have been accused of preaching on it--but I will continue to do so, despite my mixed feelings about the continuation/value of my own education.

1 comment:

Scottybubatty said...

i know what you mean.